Part One: What if we are all Worthy?

What if we make an assumption that we are all part of an elite team of souls who are here to help each other and the Earth to transform to the next most wonderous stage? What if every person and situation you come across is delivering a message to you that will help you towards that most wonderful possible future? What if everyone who meets you is receiving a message just for them, delivered through you with your words and actions? What if everyone is really an infinite being having a human experience, and there is no possible way for us not to be worthy of being here?

How might it change things if every person were to just accept that they are valuable and worthy just as they are?

What if we belong to a universe that is a vast web of cooperative communities, and not a tooth and claw brutal competition for survival of the meanest?  What if we have the option to choose how we direct our energy, or the option of turning our energy over to others towards their own ends?  What if everything could change in an instant if enough of us woke up to this possibility?

This idea that we are all here, drafted into some sort of Great Cosmic Super Bowl, is very exciting to me.  What if we all have a mission to complete? Making the assumption that we are all here for a purpose helps to keep me curious, and helps me look for the messages that others are offering me with their actions and words. Whatever those words or actions might be, and regardless of whether I like them.

I have been thinking about what we each might need as requirements in order to do the thing we showed up in this life to do.    I am suspecting that the list of what I might need for my mission and what you might need for your mission are slightly different lists.

Part Two: What role does Tragedy play?

The idea of being in the Cosmic Super Bowl helps me to be more curious when faced with difficult moments. It helps me to see myself and others as the embodiment of the divine.  Everything is pretty groovy until someone who seems to be fully shining with goodness dies young. Or when I see any of the terrible things that seem to happen daily. In those moments my faith that there is some big playbook guiding us towards awakening is pretty shaken. Why work so hard to constantly reframe things and work towards good when the forces perpetuating pain and suffering are so ubiquitous?  This is the rub, good intentions and actions are not enough to divert death, much lest terrible events. Somehow Love, the most powerful force in the world, does not always seem to “win” from the short term perspective.

My thoughts about this have been much influenced lately by the death of Meghan Hall, the Red Phoenix, in late March just a few day shy of her 33rd birthday. She was a beautiful blogger that I followed and corresponded with.  She so exemplified for me the ideals around being a force for good in the world, and of being a love amplifier.  Her family has been much on my mind.  My beliefs about the soul and our infinite being nature are such that I am not worried for Meghan. I am concerned about her deeply loved family as they journey through their grief in the world with out her.  It is a stunning loss.

At the same time I can see that her efforts to be a light and to spread a message of love had a wide ranging positive impact.  She did the things she did even while suffering.  She did them even while she was dying.  It was a clear message that the work of love  is work worth doing, always.  One lesson from Meghan’s life for me is to really prioritize gratitude, and finding ways to give back.

In the passing of a young mother it is difficult to fathom why tragedy happens so often.  The words written on the wall in Kolkata by Mother Theresa encouraging people to: forgive, be kind, be honest, do good, and be happy,  and do all of these things “anyway”, despite how it may all seemingly come to nought.  Those words are a reminder to be encouraged that our actions are not about the outcome, they are for the intrinsic value of living a just life with dignity, respect, and love.   Meghan’s death inspires a certain sense of urgency within me to get on with the work of being most authentically myself, and doing what ever good I can “anyway.”

The world around us is filled with swirling global tensions and simultaneously the exquisite unfurling beauty of spring.  I find myself struck by the contrasts- very moved by the preciousness of life- and disturbed by the ongoing crazy that is the world stage in these times. If the world is not a competition, but rather is more naturally holding the possibility of cooperation, then the motivation to be a more disciplined proponate of love is much stronger.

Part Three: What if I believe and then just get on with it?

When dark deeds rise in prominence, or when someone dies too young, it becomes very difficult to believe in the more benevolent outcome possibilities. However, to immerse myself in the darkness by giving all of my attention to the hard things very much works in favor of the dark.  In these last few weeks I have had a few disheartening things happen, and have been much tempted by despair. It has required extra effort to  practice “loving anyway.”  It is a discipline to look at everyone I meet and seek ways to remember, to recognize, that they are a manifestation of God. It is an act of courage to trust in that – that even when it is hidden from me it is still true.  I can almost feel how Love can be magnified just a bit more when I succeed with those efforts, and how when I descend into anger and judgement everything in my world seems dimmer.

Understanding what is on my list of needed things for my “life mission”  is an ongoing challenge.  I think that there are many commonly held needs, like nourishing food, safety, etc – and there are various things that are specific to us as individuals. I think that this somewhat mysterious personal list is very much connected with my capacity to be less judgmental, and ultimately happy. Much like a plant has specific requirements in order to flourish so do we.  Perhaps I once was better at multitasking, and of keeping many balls spinning through the air. This is not where I find myself now.  My body, my animal self, requires good sleep,  good food, and down time. My spirit requires practices that keep me centered to the Earth and Sky.  Without prioritizing these things I am pretty much operating within a continuous unconscious puppet show.

I have only recently realized that my need for space, in the form of an orderly work-space, and an extended block of time-space, are both prerequisites I need in  order to do creative work.  The effort to reclaim my studio workspace has highlighted the why of my not doing more art in the three years since cancering.  It is about both setting aside time on my schedule, and having a clear organized work area.  This realization though simple actually explains why so many people may not ever manage to get around to doing the things that bring them bliss.  Clutter may be holding us back from creating a world of more glorious possibilities that we can make together if we live our mission.  Not prioritizing the time needed to really zero in on what brings us joy, may be hindering millions from doing what they came here to do.

I think that having my life out of alignment with my mission supports the shadow side of myself. It is just easier to be on task when I have the tools I need specifically. If I prioritize doing what I know supports my being I am better able to continue to be my best self when hard things come up. When I don’t? Well the further down that rabbit hole I go the more I become reactionary.  It is my responsibility to keep myself on track, even though our society does not value nor understand the need for a slower more centered existence.

While in the midst of a long tenacious effort towards something, like I found myself during the start-up years at the Scorcher, it was very easy to lose track of myself. It absolutely did not seem possible then to do self care in the ways I am now understanding are essential for me. Breast cancer provided me with a  grand restart – a sort of personal timeout from the Cosmic Super Bowl.  I know now that I need to do things differently in order to live on mission from here on out.

When  I accept complete responsibility for my life, I do things differently. Without being too precious about it, without offering excuses for myself when I act out.  When I accept responsibility for living my truth, the societal ideas that do not support my truth hold less sway.  I recognize that like a plant I can only thrive and bloom when I meet the particular  needs of my niche.  When I do so I expend less energy fighting to be worthy.  If I am a forest plant that needs dappled light and lots of moisture, there is no use beating myself up because I can’t live in the desert.

My hope for you is that you may find time to follow your bliss – that you find your niche, so that it may help you can get some clarity on your mission in this big cosmic Super Bowl.  Just imagine what the world can be like if we all choose to love anyway just a little bit more.