So a couple of months ago my friend Jan sent me a link to a music video by this guy Pharrell Williams. As I live under a bit of a rock, pop culture wise, I am not sure who this guy is – however I have been dancing nearly daily to this song since Jan sent it to me. His video features anonymous people dancing in mostly public spaces, it is really fun to dance with them. The video has inspired people all over the world to make little flash mob videos to the song too. There is one made by a group in Cambodia that features alter-abled residents of a assisted community there – beaming faces dancing, it’s great. I also particularly liked this one from Budapest:
The most surprising thing about this pooka ride journey has been how often I have been feeling truly happy. Joy that has been very much facilitated by the great people we know. One of the things about facing a serious illness is that some of the barriers to expressing love come down, which is true even at the bank it seems. For example, Joe and I stopped at the bank last week, and for just a bit the professional facade came down and we were surrounded by smiling loving workers, wishing us well. This is so beneficial to healing, especially because the love that members of a community feel towards one another does not always find ways to be expressed easily. When it does such moments make it impossible to believe that we are not loved, and very easy to believe that we are surrounded by love all the time. I mean just think about all the people you love, all the people who you enjoy interacting with. Social constraints prevent expressions of love outside of family groups most of the time. I am learning that an absence of expression should not be confused with an absence of love. I believe that each of us is made of love- and when we are able to let out the light from within, and share it with each other, the effect is bigger than we can know.
On top of the bounty of loved local loved ones, recent out of town guests have left me feeling awash in love. (Which seems like great preparation for my last Chemo treatment on April 1st.) March contained two green weeks for me, by which I mean the “good” weeks for high blood counts, and minimal side effects. As March draws to a close I am feeling so thankful and lucky to have had folks travel to see us from other parts of the country. Joe’s sister Alice and Family (Husband Rusty, children Elisa and Pete) came for a few days from Houston Texas. Lenny, old housemate and Scorcher coworker, stopped in on his way from Puget Sound to San Francisco. Dear friends, the Quennell Family from upstate New York, made food and music at our house all this week. Cath & Eldon our longtime friends made a stop this weekend on their spring brake with their boy Isaac. Betsy from Colorado will meet up with us after some doctor appointments in Portland tomorrow, and we will get to see my Portland Family as well. It is super easy to feel happy when surrounded by beloved people.
Getting outside daily for the big 3 mile loop walk in my neighborhood has also contributed greatly to my wellbeing. Have you noticed, Spring has been smiling big rainbows during the sun breaks? The winter water birds numbers are thinning – no mergansers or coots to be found these days- only two buffleheads spotted today- rather than the big rafts of them of a month ago. The returning summer song birds make up a bit for these departures, as do the hoards of bumblebees swarming the blooming willows. Many familiar plants are starting to grow and bloom again. There is joy in all the myriad details. I have decided that all of these things must surely contribute multiple percentage points in my favor for my chances of moving forward free of cancer-ing cells when all the intense treatments are finished.
We travel into Portland tomorrow for doctors appointments and an MRI to check the progress of the Chemo treatments in preparation for surgery later in the month. Tuesday will be my 6th and final Yew and Platinum treatment- which has me pretty happy. Right now it seems like the light is winning out over the darkness.
P.S. After starting this entry, I learned from some of our guests over the weekend that Pharrell Williams could not be more famous- I love that I learned about him from someone 30 years older than me. If you knew all about him perhaps my lack of pop culture knowledge will provide a bit of humor to lighten up your day- feel free to laugh at my expense- if you just learned about him from me enjoy the dance along.